Friday, July 4, 2014

My Reaction to the "shocking misogynist attacks Feminism, defends rape culture" video

A new friend posted this video on his wall and welcomed rebuttal. Claiming it was a silly title but had excellent points therein...so, coffee in hand, pen and paper along for the ride, I gave it a look see. I will warn you, it is an hour long, and even thougt it left me with many questions, and I didnt agree with ALL of it, I do recommend you watch it! Without further ado, here is the video, followed by my notes/thoughts, please feel free to give me any answers you have and ask any questions that this leads you to. I want to reiterate that I dont proofread or check grammar...Im a busy mama! 

My Rebuttal:

*women are in control and are the teachers, what are they teaching? Religion, the true evil here. Is there anything more misogynistic than most religions? *he isnt what I would call a misogynist, he's more like me, a humanist.

 *without father figures, there is no physical help with the children, no example of how to treat women, the tired, stressed, resentful, overworked mothers....the kids pick up on those emotions as well. And this is in an ideal single mother setting, that doesnt involve hard drugs, etc.

 *It would only take 5 years yes, but when should that begin? when will there be a break in the cycle so that we can all be stepford wives? when will all men who take off, stay and raise their kids and contribute to the homes so that all the mothers can become stepford wives? what of all the military wives and children? what should we do in the meantime while we wait on this five years to begin?

 *promiscuity isnt a problem...is it? I see nothing wrong with it so long as its consensual and responsible. 

*both parties should be choosing each other in a dating situation. once a commitment is made, shouldnt it be honored despite who took the initiative to ask the other to fuck?

 *the quality of offers made to women by men is generally severely lacking!!! 

* Yes, we get to decide who ultimately puts their dick in us (in standard cases). But, I think its safe to assume that in the majority of cases, most people are on their best behavior when they first meet someone else and that there should be room allowed in his argument for people to show their true colors later and for that to not be okay.

 *its not like test driving, unless its a car sold by Harry Wormwood

 *do women actually blame all of lifes problems on the guy she chose, or the relationship which evolved once everyone stopped being on their best behavior?

 *as a general rule, women work harder at making the best of relationships, they stick it out longer and put up with more..they settle for less

. *if a woman finally says "I've given this guy years of my life, I savored every shred of good and settled for that, and I've worked on myself to make him happier, its not really been worth my time and energy" then is that the same as blaming the man? This is what most women do, we are sentimental creatures who are always looking for hope, we hate it about ourselves. Is the time given worthy of her decision? *the "micro aggression's" are not a learnt behavior, no mother or teaching woman is showing these boys to cat call and grab ass...women may have taught them aggression, but they did not teach them to rape. Women should be able to expect men to control themselves. Innocent women shouldnt have to be subjected to mens impulses just because the guys mommy wasnt nice to him. If we are talking about affects of childhoood being an excuse, then he should discuss what affect being molested or raped as a little girl should have and what all evils women should be able to use it as an excuse for... 

*Single moms are selfish and abusive for not giving their kids away to a broken system? how can he criticize the moms who use daycare (I am troubled by its effects too), but then suggest that single moms should truly abandon their kids to the system and the hope that they may (with luck?) be adopted into a good home, as though that is better? It just doesnt make sense.

 *How would a kid abandoned deemed to live in the system (they dont all get adopted) fair? future rapist?? How many get raped or molested while in foster homes?

 *He is blaming women for not making men stay to raise the kids...even stating that women ran them off (because again, he has no control over his own actions...), but he isnt holding the men accountable at all. Mom wants baby..dad doesnt...dad leaves..mom keeps baby, which makes her selfish and abusive no matter how much she loves the baby...dad is free to go..mom shouldnt be able to force dads involvement monetarily because she didnt keep her legs closed. But what if (and this isnt a stretch) dad was a liar and made her think they would stay together, then dad knocked her up, and then bailed....

 *circumcision is often done so "he will look like dad", which takes dads feelings into consideration, but not childs feelings. Another example of women being subservient to the dad and to again, religion.

 *I love that he is an ap parent and is against helicopter parenting. 

*my body, my choice- varies based on the situation and is a slippery slope. You have to apply it to abortion, and to circumcision and gender reassignment surgery and on and on...

 *I love how anti-circ he is and that he openly calls it gender mutilation!

 *he says something to the effect of consequences of mistakes including giving a child up for adoption and how its "hellishly easy" to escape those consequences...now, I'm not sure if I mean to praise single moms, but I certainly respect them immensely, because it IS in fact extremely difficult to raise children. Hell, its incredibly difficult for ME AS A STAY AT HOME MOM. To do it as a single mom is infinitely harder-and while welfare makes it easier financially, ultimately it would be much much easier with a man or partner there to help with all of it. The partner should be responsible for his mistakes which led to the kids that mom loved enough to keep, and dad didnt love enough to not bail on. However, generally he is a deadbeat, making it harder for mom and the kids...whatever happened to dad being partially responsible for putting a condom on? Sure she should have enforced it...but its his dick, he took the risk too, and he didnt even pull out..so he shouldnt get to just walk away and not be accountable. She stepped up.

 *if mom HAD put the boys up for adoption instead of being a single mom, then the child would still have a sense of "she didnt want me" and how many of them would still be rapists and how many of them would later be control freaks in relationships who tried to make "her want me"?